Why Being Hard on Yourself Can Sabotage Your New Years Resolution!
If you have ever tried to follow a nutrition plan or a workout plan, you know how challenging it can be to stick to it consistently. Sometimes, life gets in the way, and you may find yourself skipping a meal, indulging in a treat, or missing a workout. When that happens, how do you react? Do you shrug it off and get back on track, or do you beat yourself up and feel guilty, ashamed, or angry?
If you belong to the latter group, you are not alone. Many people tend to be hard on themselves when they deviate from their health goals, thinking that this will motivate them to do better next time. However, research shows that being hard on yourself can actually have the opposite effect, and cause more harm than good. Here are some of the negative consequences of being hard on yourself:
It lowers your self-esteem and self-confidence.
By telling yourself that you are not good enough, that you are a failure, or that you are unworthy, you can damage your self-image and make yourself doubt your abilities and potential. As a result, you may lose your motivation, enthusiasm, and drive to pursue your health goals, or any other goals for that matter.
It increases your stress and anxiety levels.
You create a lot of negative emotions, such as guilt, shame, anger, or frustration. These emotions can trigger your stress response, which can have harmful effects on your physical and mental health. For example, stress can impair your immune system, increase your blood pressure, disrupt your sleep, and affect your mood and cognition. Stress can also make you more likely to engage in unhealthy behaviors, such as overeating, smoking, or drinking, which can further compromise your health goals.
It prevents you from learning and improving.
By being hard on yourself, you are focusing on the past and what went wrong, rather than on the present and what you can do to improve. This can prevent you from learning from your mistakes, finding solutions, and making positive changes. Instead of being hard on yourself, you should be curious and compassionate, and ask yourself questions such as: What caused me to deviate from my plan? What can I learn from this experience? What can I do differently next time? How can I prevent this from happening again?
It reduces your happiness and satisfaction.
Being hard on yourself means you are setting yourself up for disappointment and frustration. You are constantly comparing yourself to unrealistic or idealized standards, and ignoring or dismissing your achievements and progress. This can make you feel unhappy and dissatisfied with yourself and your life, and rob you of the joy and pleasure that come from pursuing your health goals.
As you can see, being hard on yourself can sabotage your health goals and your well-being. So, what can you do instead? Here are some tips and strategies to help you be more kind and forgiving to yourself:
Recognize and challenge your negative self-talk.
When you catch yourself being hard on yourself, stop and examine your thoughts. Are they true, helpful, or constructive? If not, challenge them and replace them with more positive and realistic ones. For example, instead of saying “I’m such a loser, I can’t stick to anything”, say “I’m human, I make mistakes, but I can learn and improve”.
Practice gratitude and appreciation.
Instead of focusing on what you lack or what you did wrong, focus on what you have and what you did right. Express gratitude and appreciation for yourself and your efforts, and celebrate your achievements and progress, no matter how small or big. For example, instead of saying “I only lost 1 kilogram this month, that’s nothing”, say “I’m grateful that I lost 1 kilogram this month, that’s a step in the right direction”.
Be compassionate and supportive.
Treat yourself as you would treat a friend or a loved one who is struggling with their health goals. Be compassionate and supportive, and offer yourself kindness and encouragement. For example, instead of saying “You’re so weak, you can’t resist temptation”, say “You’re doing your best, you can overcome this challenge”.
Seek help and guidance.
If you are having trouble sticking to your health goals, don’t be afraid or ashamed to seek help and guidance from others. Reach out to your friends, family, or a professional, and ask for their support, advice, or feedback. They can help you stay accountable, motivated, and inspired, and provide you with valuable resources and tips.
Being hard on yourself can be tempting, but it is not helpful or healthy. Instead, be kind and forgiving to yourself, and you will see that your health goals will become easier and more enjoyable to achieve. Remember, you are not perfect, but you are worthy and capable of reaching your health goals and improving your well-being.
